Whether it’s a boy or a girl, many people like to use tests as a touchstone for relationships, and may even use many tests to get the results they want. But in fact, relationships cannot stand the test. You Once you start testing each other.
Then the wheels of suspicion between you are starting to roll. Maybe until you break up, the person who starts to doubt will definitely try every means to prove that the other person is unfaithful. Such wheels may only be able to stop after breaking up.
Then why are there always people who are keen to test their partner in relationships?
1. Self-identity Feeling of inadequacy
You need to base your recognition of yourself on the extent to which the other person loves you. For you, in a relationship, the normal thoughtfulness and care are far from reaching your heart. requested.
In this case, the test becomes what you consider to be the touchstone of your relationship, and you require that you get the other person's "unconditional love" during the test.
"Unconditional love" itself is a paradox.
The other person must meet certain requirements of yours in order to be considered as loving you enough. This is no longer unconditional.
Once you fall into this vicious circle of testing the other person to prove your worth, you will continue to fall into a vicious cycle in the relationship, and you will not stop until you destroy the relationship with your own hands.
2. A serious lack of sense of security, leading to emotional dislocation
I don’t know if you have ever experienced such a situation Experience, if your ex broke up with you because of cheating.
Then you won’t believe in love for quite some time. Even if you have a new partner, you will always be wary of his/her cheating. This matter of cheating will become a hidden disease in your heart.
If you can speak out and face the pain, maybe the relationship will develop in a positive direction, but the reality is that many people are unwilling to expose their own scars, so they can only continue to put pressure on their partner. A test to prove that he or she loves you and will not cheat on you.
But have you ever thought about it, when you decide to test the other person, you have already put the other person on the opposite side.
Because when you test the other person, the expected premise is that he is not loyal, he cannot withstand temptation, he does not love you enough... and your test is to verify this result.
Therefore, do not try to test the other person in a relationship. This will only increase troubles. After all, the relationship itself is It is already complicated and difficult to distinguish, there is no need to add some artificial intrigues.
No matter what the result of the test is, once the truth is revealedLu, you are both successful, because if he has problems and fails the test, then he is not worthy of you. If he has no problems and passes the test, then you are not worthy of him.
Life is difficult enough. The person we want to choose must be someone who can solve problems with us, rather than create problems for us.
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