Many boys chat with girls, and the chat always turns into awkward chats, leaving the other party with no desire to continue chatting with them. Naturally, it becomes more difficult to chase girls. So how can chatting with a girl make her interested in continuing the conversation?
1. Cross-cutting of topics
Many boys chat with girls like this:
< p> Female: "It's so hot today. My air conditioner is broken. It's great to have air conditioning here."Male: "Yes, it's very hot today. There's no direct car from my home here. I'm sorry." We walked for 10 minutes under the sun."
Female: "It will be much cooler here. Let's go find a place to drink some cold drinks."
Male: "Okay, let's go." The damn sun almost peeled off my skin."
Female: "What do you like to eat? I want to eat smoothies."
Male: "You can lead the way, finally." No need to bask in the sun."
Female: "Oh, let's go."
After that, a similar conversation happened again, and then he found that the girl was more interested in the mobile phone. Got him.
Do you feel that there is something not natural enough about this conversation?
This is actually a very failed conversation. This conversation seems to be chatting with each other, and in the end it seems to have reached an agreement. Consistent, but in fact the boy kept talking with his own thoughts and the topics did not cross.
Generally the reason for this phenomenon is that you did not pay attention to listen and did not understand what the other party was saying. For example, a girl said air conditioner It's bad, but the boy focused on being exposed for 10 minutes, and then the girl made suggestions based on the current problems faced by both parties, trying to make the topics cross, but then the boy responded by describing how he was being exposed, and the whole scene During the conversation, he kept describing his own state, which was more like a self-performance, resulting in a stumbling chat.
When you chat like this, you won’t be able to talk for more than a few words and you will start to doubt your life, because you don’t know what you are talking about to her.
How to change this stumbling chat situation?
First of all, listen, you must listen to extract the information contained in the other party's words.
Secondly, your words should closely match the information in the other person’s words and give feedback.
For example, the girl’s first sentence contains two pieces of information: “There is no air conditioning at home”, which is a big problem she faces, and then she conveys “I am very satisfied to date you.” Location" means that your invitation just solves her current big problem.
Then at this time, the boy can say: "Wow, it seems that I made the appointment very timely, and just saved you. Tell me, how can you thank me?"
At this time A girl might reply like this: "Let's go, let's take you to have a drink and cool down."
In this way, the conversation will look more natural, so the following conversation may occur:
Male: "Then let's go!"
< p> Female: "Whatever do you like to eat, I want to eat smoothies."Male: "It doesn't matter, I will accompany you whatever you like to eat."
Female: "I remember I had a good mango last time, let’s go.”
Looking at this chat now, it is considered a real chat. The conversation between men and women takes over each other’s words and then makes logical responses. Coping, this is called silky smooth chat.
If we want to chat with a girl smoothly and for a long time, we must pay attention to the fact that you are communicating with her. Since it is communication, then we must pay attention to interactivity. The dialogue between the two parties is like the exchange of moves between martial arts masters. Only by exchanging moves can you continue to fight. Otherwise, the other party will attack you and you are just self-performing. Then you will be KOed by the other party with one move, killing you instantly.
If you keep talking to yourself, no matter how proactive the girl is and no matter how good the topic is, you won’t be able to continue the conversation.
2. Switch topics naturally
There will always be a moment when any topic is finished. If a topic is When the conversation is over and no new topics arise, you may suddenly fall into an awkward situation. If you can switch to a new topic in time before this happens, you can avoid embarrassment and make the chat transition smoother.
The most commonly used method: keyword transfer method
When there are signs that a topic is almost finished, for example, you find that the girl’s answer is a bit boring, and you have to rack your brains to think of it. How to reply to her? These characteristics indicate that this topic may be almost gone. At this time, we can find some keywords in the current conversation in time to divert the topic and create new topics.
For example:
You talk to a girl about "nightlife" -
Girl: "Yeah, my daily life with my best friend Just go and eat crayfish after dancing.”
When a girl talks about it, you already feel that this topic is no longer necessary to talk about. Now that we have talked about the things after the end, this matter can start to move. For girls. There is "crayfish" in it, which can be used as a keyword to change the topic.
Male: "Haha, my mouth is watering again when I talk about crayfish. In this weather, crayfish paired with cold beer is so refreshing!"
Female: "That's right, that's right. , I felt so happy at the time, but unfortunately we changed jobs and couldn’t take vacations together, so we didn’t continue like this.”
Male: “Oh? What do you and your bestie do now?”
p>
Has a new topic emerged again? As long as you are good at grasping these keywords, you can guide the topic however you want.Guidance, isn't it natural and smooth?
3. Try to talk about the key points
If your chat with a girl is filled with a lot of irrelevant content , will also cause the chat to become very stagnant.
Because there is no logic and no focus in your speech, you have not considered what you want to say at all. Your mind may drift to another point after saying this sentence, so that others cannot concentrate on analyzing what you want to express. What, you yourself have no idea.
This is a very dangerous way of chatting, because girls either think you are inexperienced, and girls usually like to deal with experienced men, which means that he can think carefully in all aspects.
Or simply think that your IQ is not enough!
To solve this problem, you have two ways:
1. Develop logical skills
< p> 2. Accumulate chat materials. As the saying goes, "When books are used, they will be less useful." The same is true for chat. I usually don't analyze girls' interests and hobbies, nor pay attention to the current affairs around them, nor do I accumulate some humorous chat cases. Once you start chatting, you will find that you can’t say anything clearly.
❋ Tags: