Recently, I had a chat with my close friend about the topic of love. Honestly, as someone who has been through it, I really want to share some experiences with young girls. While love is beautiful, protecting oneself is even more important. Today, I want to talk about how to maintain your boundaries in a relationship.
First and foremost, I believe the most important thing is to keep a clear mind. Many girls tend to develop "love goggles" once they start dating, taking their partner's words as gospel. I have a friend who did just that; her boyfriend said, "I'll take care of you," and she actually quit her job. The result? She now lives day-to-day at his mercy, even getting scolded for buying a durian, which is considered a waste of money. So, financial independence is crucial—it's your ultimate safety net.
Speaking of finances, be very cautious about lending money. I"ve seen too many cases where girls ended up in debt because they took out loans for their boyfriends. A commenter online put it well: "A little more rationality can prevent a lot of unnecessary harm." Indeed, someone who truly loves you wouldn't put you at such risk.
Regarding intimacy, I think it"s important to maintain certain boundaries before marriage. This isn't about being conservative but about taking responsibility for yourself. Another commenter mentioned the issue of premarital pregnancy, and it's spot on: "Premarital pregnancy does put women in a more passive position and causes greater harm, especially physically. Meanwhile, men can usually walk away unscathed." This really hits home for many people.
Lastly, I want to emphasize that you should never be the other woman. Not only does it hurt others, but it also harms yourself. I know a girl who willingly became a backup for so-called love, and as a result, she not only lost her dignity but also nearly ruined her reputation. Our parents worked hard to raise us, not to see us suffer such indignities.
Love is beautiful, but the prerequisite is learning to love yourself. Remember, you deserve respect and to be cherished. If a relationship causes you to lose yourself, it"s time to seriously reconsider. After all, the person who will be with you till the end is always yourself.
I hope these insights are helpful. If you have similar experiences or thoughts, feel free to share them in the comments below~
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