Recently, I had a conversation with friends about the topic of love. Honestly, as someone who has experienced several relationships, I deeply feel that love really requires some "self-defense techniques." Especially now that the term PUA is becoming more common, many women unknowingly find themselves in difficult situations in their relationships.
I remember seeing some data before, stating that PUA phenomena exist in every city, every industry, and even within families. Honestly, I was quite shocked when I saw this data. But upon closer thought, many friends around me have indeed encountered similar situations. For example, my close friend Xiaomei, whose ex-boyfriend always belittled her, saying she wasn't good enough and didn't deserve him. At first, Xiaomei thought he just had high standards, but later realized it was actually a form of mental control.
Speaking of PUA, a netizen in the comments section made an interesting point: "This is called PUA?? This is just ordinary male control desire." Indeed, sometimes the line between PUA and control desire is very blurry, but no matter what it's called, the harm to women is real. As another netizen said: "I've experienced it, it really ruins lives, the most terrifying part is the violence and threats... even years later I still have nightmares..."
So today, I want to share some of my insights, hoping to help sisters who are in love or preparing to be in love:
First, always maintain independence. I have a friend who, after getting into a relationship, devoted all her time to her boyfriend, and after the breakup, she completely broke down. Remember, your life shouldn't be all about love; you should also have your own friends and hobbies.
Second, cherishing yourself is really important. A netizen in the comments section said it well: "When he asks you to delete opposite-sex friends, why not ask him to do the same?" This really resonated with me. Any relationship should be equal. If the other person always asks you to change but does nothing themselves, there's definitely something wrong with the relationship.
Also, learn to communicate. I've seen too many couples break up due to poor communication. In fact, many times the problem isn't as serious as imagined, it's just that neither side is willing to speak up. As someone in the comments said: "Be honest with each other ????," this is really key to maintaining a relationship.
Lastly, and most importantly, love yourself. A netizen in the comments said: "People who grow up in happy families are not easily PUAed." I think this makes a lot of sense. Only when you love yourself enough and are confident enough, will you not be easily influenced by others' words.
Speaking of PUA, another netizen in the comments asked: "What does PUA mean?" Simply put, PUA is a form of mental control, using belittlement and suppression to make the other person lose confidence and become completely dependent on you. This behavior is really scary, so sisters must stay vigilant.
In conclusion, love is beautiful, but you also need to stay clear-headed. I hope every woman can meet someone who truly cherishes them, and if not, then learn to love yourself well. After all, as someone in the comments said: "When you meet such a person, just break up," sometimes cutting losses in time is the best protection for yourself.
Finally, I want to ask everyone, have you encountered similar situations in your relationships? Feel free to share your stories and opinions in the comments, let's learn from each other and grow together.
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